For years I made decisions based on what others would think of me. Trying too hard to make people like me was a long, conditioned thought pattern. It’s a very exhausting way to live. In reality, no one else really cares that much about whether they like me or not, because each person is looking through their own lense of wondering what others think of them on some level. This got real crazy when I had more than one person in my life that I was trying to impress. First off, it’s impossible. For argument sake, let’s say there is only two people to impress. They are not going to be in full agreement of your actions at all times. For fun, let’s add in 3 more, than another 5, then 10...well you get the point.
The real life changing growth for me came when I made this simple shift and starting repeating this mantra to myself. “It doesn’t matter how others feel about me, it only matters how I feel about them”. As trivial as this may seem, I noticed a difference in how I felt almost instantly. After a week of that, my life and relationships started taking on a whole new life.
Here’s why I think the act of letting this go works so well. If we are relying on others to make us feel better, we have introduced a pressure on them that is unfair and they are not equipped to handle. Oh... you can go on for quite while demanding other people fulfill your self worth, but the end result will be a downward spiral of depression and lack of self worth.
The good news is, it’s an easy fix. Sure, I had to keep reminding myself of this until the years of conditioning began to fall away. But it get’s easier all the time and a new conditioning of loving myself for exactly who I am and loving others for exactly who they are, replaces the old habits. By the way, this is a huge step in attracting the people to your life that will be interested in helping you Dream Big. Many times, this act of helping you will be part of their own life of Dreaming Big.